I have this thing when I'm writting....blogging...to title my posts before I begin.
Just like 90% of the classes I teach, I walk in with an agenda. A theme upon which the class is built. The postures I plan enhance the theme, the words I choose drive the point home, and the reflection in Savasana brings it all full circle.
Unfortunately for us, life is not that tightly wrapped.
It's never a pretty little package, complete with bows and chocolate buttons. And I mean that if you're just looking at life as a whole or it's various and challenging puzzle pieces. In fact, I'm convinced that the more you drift through this life trying to align everything perfectly, the more these twisty and turny paths mess with you. Just for fun.
So....can we be okay with just...being? Can we be okay with identifying the various pieces that make us whole, and live by that. Nay....live TRUE to that? And hold that true every day that our plans, agenda's, and alignment get tossed aside for something bigger?
Who needs a pretty little package when you have something raw and unique, that's untapped? Who needs planning and perfection when knowledge is just around the corner?
Be brave. Learn how to BE you.
Sunday, December 9, 2012
Friday, October 5, 2012
FLEXIBILITY
I had 3 lovely ladies in class yesterday who were all friends. It was a sweet thing to watch, since these 3 Cross Fit together, are friendly together, and in general just had a nice eb and flow to their friendship.
As I got to chatting with them before class, they told me about their Cross Fit dedication, and I immediately abandoned my initial plan figuring we'd focus on deep stretches. As we got started, so did the moans...the groans...the giggling...and, inevitably, some physical barriers.
As strong as these girls were, individually and as unit, I guided them to utilize something different. Anytime I'd see various areas of the body tense up, I'd ease them deeper into the resistance that they were trying to put forth.
As a yoga instructor I, and many others, see this often. As a coach, I see this just as often. Except while I'm coaching the mind is the muscle that's putting forth that resistance, so that it doesn't ignite what lies in the heart.
Recently I used the word resilience in some of my work with my own teacher. I quickly came to realize resilience is just a fancier term for conform. Would I say these girls were resilient to the change of fitness methods? No. Would I say they were conforming to Yoga? No. Would I say they were utilizing flexibility?
YES!
This concept...FLEXIBILITY...really has nothing to do with the body initially It has everything to do with acceptance of the change of environment happening around you, and figuring out how you can work within those changes! In that class, as I was mercilessly putting them through hamstring stretch after hamstring stretch...I had no expectations. Whether they put their nose to their knee, or their nose in the air...they were still in the pose! Trying the pose on for size, and get this...even following my instruction! They were all for it! It was a very proud moment as a teacher...because the concept in some way/shape/form got through to them. Whether they knew it or not.
We closed class, we Om'd, and we started to make our way out of the studio. The girls were smiling, planning the rest of their night...when one said to me, "I can't stop smiling." I giggled with them, and labeled it "Yoga High".
What I really wanted to sincerely say to them all was, "Thank you for your flexibility!"
~NAMASTE~
As I got to chatting with them before class, they told me about their Cross Fit dedication, and I immediately abandoned my initial plan figuring we'd focus on deep stretches. As we got started, so did the moans...the groans...the giggling...and, inevitably, some physical barriers.
As strong as these girls were, individually and as unit, I guided them to utilize something different. Anytime I'd see various areas of the body tense up, I'd ease them deeper into the resistance that they were trying to put forth.
As a yoga instructor I, and many others, see this often. As a coach, I see this just as often. Except while I'm coaching the mind is the muscle that's putting forth that resistance, so that it doesn't ignite what lies in the heart.
Recently I used the word resilience in some of my work with my own teacher. I quickly came to realize resilience is just a fancier term for conform. Would I say these girls were resilient to the change of fitness methods? No. Would I say they were conforming to Yoga? No. Would I say they were utilizing flexibility?
YES!
This concept...FLEXIBILITY...really has nothing to do with the body initially It has everything to do with acceptance of the change of environment happening around you, and figuring out how you can work within those changes! In that class, as I was mercilessly putting them through hamstring stretch after hamstring stretch...I had no expectations. Whether they put their nose to their knee, or their nose in the air...they were still in the pose! Trying the pose on for size, and get this...even following my instruction! They were all for it! It was a very proud moment as a teacher...because the concept in some way/shape/form got through to them. Whether they knew it or not.
We closed class, we Om'd, and we started to make our way out of the studio. The girls were smiling, planning the rest of their night...when one said to me, "I can't stop smiling." I giggled with them, and labeled it "Yoga High".
What I really wanted to sincerely say to them all was, "Thank you for your flexibility!"
~NAMASTE~
Tuesday, September 18, 2012
GROUND
There's something that happens when the seasons change. When you take a moment to observe what's happening with Mother Nature....it all feels unbalanced. One minute it's raining, and windy, only for the next moment to welcome the sun. One day it's warm, one day it's hot, and the next humid.
There's just really no telling what's next.
Can you relate that to the moments when you lose your own balance? You lose your keys, leave the coffee on top of the car and drive away, are wearing mis-matched socks (or shoes, even!), find the salt in the refrigerator and the milk in the cabinet.
Everything around you is swirling around in chaos, and you're ALLOWING your mind to follow suit. Allowing it to get swept up in disorder.
Why not slow down? What's going to come crashing down to earth? Well...maybe you!
Slowing down and simply observing the chaos is just one way to get you back to yourself and your natural rhythm. Routine is another way to connect with the elements that surround you and get a hold on them.
The amazing thing...is...it all comes back to that magical concept of CONNECTION!
Stopping grounds you, routine grounds you, breath grounds you, exercise grounds you, rest (mind AND body) grounds you, playfulness and not taking it all so seriously....IT ALL GROUNDS YOU!
Why? Because at the core of your nature, you're nurturing yourself. Which in turn helps you tune into what makes you, you. When you're not grounded you're not connected to yourself. I've seen people who are deathly afraid of that connection, yet crave it. They'll use work, family, etc to keep busy and avoid the connection. Yet they'll positively yearn for that sense of connection. But, HOW? How exactly do you get it?
Dig just a little bit deeper and connect to what moves you! Don't be fearful. Anything, everything you every need is always within you.
There's just really no telling what's next.
Can you relate that to the moments when you lose your own balance? You lose your keys, leave the coffee on top of the car and drive away, are wearing mis-matched socks (or shoes, even!), find the salt in the refrigerator and the milk in the cabinet.
Everything around you is swirling around in chaos, and you're ALLOWING your mind to follow suit. Allowing it to get swept up in disorder.
Why not slow down? What's going to come crashing down to earth? Well...maybe you!
Slowing down and simply observing the chaos is just one way to get you back to yourself and your natural rhythm. Routine is another way to connect with the elements that surround you and get a hold on them.
The amazing thing...is...it all comes back to that magical concept of CONNECTION!
Stopping grounds you, routine grounds you, breath grounds you, exercise grounds you, rest (mind AND body) grounds you, playfulness and not taking it all so seriously....IT ALL GROUNDS YOU!
Why? Because at the core of your nature, you're nurturing yourself. Which in turn helps you tune into what makes you, you. When you're not grounded you're not connected to yourself. I've seen people who are deathly afraid of that connection, yet crave it. They'll use work, family, etc to keep busy and avoid the connection. Yet they'll positively yearn for that sense of connection. But, HOW? How exactly do you get it?
Dig just a little bit deeper and connect to what moves you! Don't be fearful. Anything, everything you every need is always within you.
Monday, September 10, 2012
UNITY
11 years ago.
We all remember where we were and our initial thoughts as we watched American flight 11 cruise into the North Tower, with United Airlines flight 175 following into the South Tower.
Disbelief washed over an entire nation...then panic...and then....reality.
Reality of what we were dealing with, and what we were in for. Reality of every single victim, every individual tragedy.
...and then support, in every single direction to guide the rest of us to some semblance safety.
11 years later, America has come very far. Yes we're in economic turmoil and yes things have been trying in so many different ways....but as a unit we've come far. We've evolved many times over. And it stems from that day.
So much happening and turning our worlds around, the enemy had made us vulnerable. Sure we immediately retaliated as a nation, but individually and within our families...we remained vulnerable. Life as we knew it would NEVER be the same. Never could be the same. As natural beings we recognized the call, and we submitted to it. Together.
There's a beauty in vulnerability, and the challenging times in our lives. Through grief, struggle, uncertainty, fear, and pain comes a rawness of the human spirit. It's the times we can naturally rely on one another without pride and ego's mixing in. Raw human experience reminds us that we are cut from the same cloth, and somehow together still WORK BEST as a unit.
I was 22 years old and remember walking down 40th Street from 8th Avenue toward 7th. It was after 4 or 5 days of non-stop news coverage, and check-in's with friends. Absorbing the sadness of who was no longer with us...yet continuing to take steps forward. Hearing the stories we all had, how we were all affected, yet feeling the clock ticking along as it always had. As I was walking, I took in the subdued city energy. New York City had slowed down and taken a moment. Nearly closed down. As we all took the moments we needed, together, to mourn what had once been.
As our City rallied and our nation rallied...so did we. A specific resilience I'd like to personally reserve for New Yorkers alone. We got back up, put our Grown Up pants back on, and did the best we could. Together.
I've felt this unity...this vulnerability to the circumstances...only twice in my life. Both times, I've thought it to be the most gorgeous of natural occurrences. I know I'm not the only one.
So, I encourage you.. implement a true practice of unity in it's truest form. Everyday. Remind yourself what that support meant to us all. Free from judgments and pride. Free from fears...NO MATTER WHAT! Everyday.
Never Forget.
We all remember where we were and our initial thoughts as we watched American flight 11 cruise into the North Tower, with United Airlines flight 175 following into the South Tower.
Disbelief washed over an entire nation...then panic...and then....reality.
Reality of what we were dealing with, and what we were in for. Reality of every single victim, every individual tragedy.
...and then support, in every single direction to guide the rest of us to some semblance safety.
11 years later, America has come very far. Yes we're in economic turmoil and yes things have been trying in so many different ways....but as a unit we've come far. We've evolved many times over. And it stems from that day.
So much happening and turning our worlds around, the enemy had made us vulnerable. Sure we immediately retaliated as a nation, but individually and within our families...we remained vulnerable. Life as we knew it would NEVER be the same. Never could be the same. As natural beings we recognized the call, and we submitted to it. Together.
There's a beauty in vulnerability, and the challenging times in our lives. Through grief, struggle, uncertainty, fear, and pain comes a rawness of the human spirit. It's the times we can naturally rely on one another without pride and ego's mixing in. Raw human experience reminds us that we are cut from the same cloth, and somehow together still WORK BEST as a unit.
I was 22 years old and remember walking down 40th Street from 8th Avenue toward 7th. It was after 4 or 5 days of non-stop news coverage, and check-in's with friends. Absorbing the sadness of who was no longer with us...yet continuing to take steps forward. Hearing the stories we all had, how we were all affected, yet feeling the clock ticking along as it always had. As I was walking, I took in the subdued city energy. New York City had slowed down and taken a moment. Nearly closed down. As we all took the moments we needed, together, to mourn what had once been.
As our City rallied and our nation rallied...so did we. A specific resilience I'd like to personally reserve for New Yorkers alone. We got back up, put our Grown Up pants back on, and did the best we could. Together.
I've felt this unity...this vulnerability to the circumstances...only twice in my life. Both times, I've thought it to be the most gorgeous of natural occurrences. I know I'm not the only one.
So, I encourage you.. implement a true practice of unity in it's truest form. Everyday. Remind yourself what that support meant to us all. Free from judgments and pride. Free from fears...NO MATTER WHAT! Everyday.
Never Forget.
Tuesday, August 28, 2012
ENDINGS
I'm not quite sure why an ending needs to be a "bad" thing. Are you?
Endings make way for beginnings. In fact! During my first Yoga Teacher Training, on our very first day we were split up into three groups. Brahma (beginnings), Vishnu (middle-ings), and Shiva (endings). We were asked to physically bring ourselves into whatever group we belonged in at that very moment.
I remember being amazed at how many people didn't know which of these three phases they were currently experiencing.
The thing I embraced at that very moment (as I coincidentally made my way to the "Shiva" group), is that endings are definitely not "bad". They don't even need to have a negative connotation. Endings should just be endings. The end!
There's things in our lives that we come across time and time again that really just are not serving us. Maybe it's a friendship, romantic relationship, career, even your family. If there's one thing I've learned in my limited years, it's the fact that every single person/place/thing in your life should be serving it's purpose. When something is doing more harm than good, it's time to say goodbye.
There's something empowering within that realization. Mostly because by identifying what's not serving you you're serving and nurturing your authentic self...but even more than that....you're moving toward something greater. Something that WILL serve you.
There are some pretty gnarly feelings that go along with endings. Sometimes guilt, longing, dissapointment, sadness, anger, frustration, confusion. None of which are necessarily AWESOME to feel. But feel them anyway, judgement free.
We go through these beginnings, middles, and ends constantly through life. The cycle alone may actually be one of few constants in life. When the haze of emotion clears what's left, well, is still YOU. This amazing force who has the COURAGE to see the light, and make it to the Vishnu. (I've been wanting to say that since I started typing, btw).
This cycle, really is the essence of our life experience.
In Yoga, we call it Nataraja. Nataraja is another form of Shiva...lord of the dance. In this picture he's doing his lil' jig...making way for Brahma. This is actually my favorite Hindu deity He's just wrecking shit and dancing all over what once was.
Why, you ask?
Because he's psyched to embark, always, on the next beginning!
Endings make way for beginnings. In fact! During my first Yoga Teacher Training, on our very first day we were split up into three groups. Brahma (beginnings), Vishnu (middle-ings), and Shiva (endings). We were asked to physically bring ourselves into whatever group we belonged in at that very moment.
I remember being amazed at how many people didn't know which of these three phases they were currently experiencing.
The thing I embraced at that very moment (as I coincidentally made my way to the "Shiva" group), is that endings are definitely not "bad". They don't even need to have a negative connotation. Endings should just be endings. The end!
There's things in our lives that we come across time and time again that really just are not serving us. Maybe it's a friendship, romantic relationship, career, even your family. If there's one thing I've learned in my limited years, it's the fact that every single person/place/thing in your life should be serving it's purpose. When something is doing more harm than good, it's time to say goodbye.
There's something empowering within that realization. Mostly because by identifying what's not serving you you're serving and nurturing your authentic self...but even more than that....you're moving toward something greater. Something that WILL serve you.
There are some pretty gnarly feelings that go along with endings. Sometimes guilt, longing, dissapointment, sadness, anger, frustration, confusion. None of which are necessarily AWESOME to feel. But feel them anyway, judgement free.
We go through these beginnings, middles, and ends constantly through life. The cycle alone may actually be one of few constants in life. When the haze of emotion clears what's left, well, is still YOU. This amazing force who has the COURAGE to see the light, and make it to the Vishnu. (I've been wanting to say that since I started typing, btw).
This cycle, really is the essence of our life experience.
In Yoga, we call it Nataraja. Nataraja is another form of Shiva...lord of the dance. In this picture he's doing his lil' jig...making way for Brahma. This is actually my favorite Hindu deity He's just wrecking shit and dancing all over what once was.
Why, you ask?
Because he's psyched to embark, always, on the next beginning!
Tuesday, August 21, 2012
PERFECTION
...most of us strive for it. Some of us get it...
...then what?
Seeking and striving for perfection is commendable. Really, it is. I see it all day long, I too tap into my inner perfectionist from time to time. Heck...I've even dated the ever seeking perfectionist.
That's the thing about perfection. There is NEVER an end result. You're always striving and striving and striving for the next slice.
For you serial perfectionists out there...have you ever stopped and enjoyed the view?
What does your endless string of perfected quests "do" for you?
I personally get exhausted when I think about myself in "perfectionist" mode. Most times, I actually feel like I'm moving against a force much like a brick wall. My brain is speeding 100+ miles a minute...and I'm literally draining myself from every resource possible that I might need to actually get myself to that perfected state.
Sound familiar?
At that drained point, I've learned how to stop and detach...but most keep on going. I did for a long, long while until I realized I never had a chance to enjoy my success. All the forward motion toward the next best thing somehow put blinders on the importance of accomplishing these things in the first place. Nevermind the light it dimmed as I moved swiftly on...
When you start to open your eyes, you see the view. When you see the view, a flow starts to seep into your movement. All of a sudden, you recognize that force...that brick wall...much more quickly. It somehow feels, un-natural. The nature of perfection IS unnatural. If we were all perfect, this world would be DAMN boring! We'd all be glamorous and successful, and my guess, we'd all be striving to be imperfect! Idiosyncrasies are what make the world go 'round! The ways we go about our work, organization, quirky personalities, organized chaos hidden within the depths of closets/basements/attics....it's all what makes us unique.
I'll never say slow down to the ever striving perfectionist. I will say, eliminate. Take all those thoughts running through your head, and the motions you go through at each turn....and assess where they're REALLY adding value. Replace it with something fun, and more individual to you.
Through perfection, perfect your SELF!
...then what?
Seeking and striving for perfection is commendable. Really, it is. I see it all day long, I too tap into my inner perfectionist from time to time. Heck...I've even dated the ever seeking perfectionist.
That's the thing about perfection. There is NEVER an end result. You're always striving and striving and striving for the next slice.
For you serial perfectionists out there...have you ever stopped and enjoyed the view?
What does your endless string of perfected quests "do" for you?
I personally get exhausted when I think about myself in "perfectionist" mode. Most times, I actually feel like I'm moving against a force much like a brick wall. My brain is speeding 100+ miles a minute...and I'm literally draining myself from every resource possible that I might need to actually get myself to that perfected state.
Sound familiar?
At that drained point, I've learned how to stop and detach...but most keep on going. I did for a long, long while until I realized I never had a chance to enjoy my success. All the forward motion toward the next best thing somehow put blinders on the importance of accomplishing these things in the first place. Nevermind the light it dimmed as I moved swiftly on...
When you start to open your eyes, you see the view. When you see the view, a flow starts to seep into your movement. All of a sudden, you recognize that force...that brick wall...much more quickly. It somehow feels, un-natural. The nature of perfection IS unnatural. If we were all perfect, this world would be DAMN boring! We'd all be glamorous and successful, and my guess, we'd all be striving to be imperfect! Idiosyncrasies are what make the world go 'round! The ways we go about our work, organization, quirky personalities, organized chaos hidden within the depths of closets/basements/attics....it's all what makes us unique.
I'll never say slow down to the ever striving perfectionist. I will say, eliminate. Take all those thoughts running through your head, and the motions you go through at each turn....and assess where they're REALLY adding value. Replace it with something fun, and more individual to you.
Through perfection, perfect your SELF!
Friday, August 10, 2012
CHARACTER
Just sort of thinking out loud...most minutes of our day to day, we stumble across quite a cast of characters.
My question...how do we let these characters affect our actions, thoughts, lives? Are you really living your own production?
These characters and all of their brilliant qualities, can seem...overwhelming. Particularly if you lose your "balance". I'm not sure about you, but sometimes I seriously feel like I'm living in a drama series. This friend with that boyfriend issue, that friend who's unemployed, this one who's car got towed, wait until you hear about his one with her ex husband who just found out about his other 8 wives.... And then of course, there's family. Which by default we're part of the production, and feel this loving itch to help/fix/solve it all.
It's intense.
Rather than muster up the energy to move past it all, we endure. Which I've come to finally realize consumes more energy than just turning a blind cheek.
The other thing you may struggle with, as you navigate your own personal cast of characters is the fact that it's pure ENJOYMENT! So you keep coming back for more. It's almost fun to get to know the different versions of people out there. And that's totally a warranted frame of mind...IF...and only if, you remember yourself. Have that clear definition of yourself handy at all times so that you don't get caught up in the wrong drama series.
Overcome the magnetic pull!
Whatever the interest, find interest in yourself first. Find true knowledge of who you are, what you stand for, and what you're here to do....retain that knowledge through every single "production" you encounter. In other words, own your own CHARACTER! Stand strong in it, and don't let any other forces sway you. This "swaying" is doubt. The only way to overcome doubt is knowledge. Always, always, always know who you are!
Find beauty in the breakdown...
My question...how do we let these characters affect our actions, thoughts, lives? Are you really living your own production?
These characters and all of their brilliant qualities, can seem...overwhelming. Particularly if you lose your "balance". I'm not sure about you, but sometimes I seriously feel like I'm living in a drama series. This friend with that boyfriend issue, that friend who's unemployed, this one who's car got towed, wait until you hear about his one with her ex husband who just found out about his other 8 wives.... And then of course, there's family. Which by default we're part of the production, and feel this loving itch to help/fix/solve it all.
It's intense.
Rather than muster up the energy to move past it all, we endure. Which I've come to finally realize consumes more energy than just turning a blind cheek.
The other thing you may struggle with, as you navigate your own personal cast of characters is the fact that it's pure ENJOYMENT! So you keep coming back for more. It's almost fun to get to know the different versions of people out there. And that's totally a warranted frame of mind...IF...and only if, you remember yourself. Have that clear definition of yourself handy at all times so that you don't get caught up in the wrong drama series.
Overcome the magnetic pull!
Whatever the interest, find interest in yourself first. Find true knowledge of who you are, what you stand for, and what you're here to do....retain that knowledge through every single "production" you encounter. In other words, own your own CHARACTER! Stand strong in it, and don't let any other forces sway you. This "swaying" is doubt. The only way to overcome doubt is knowledge. Always, always, always know who you are!
Find beauty in the breakdown...
Thursday, August 2, 2012
ACTION
...with the Olympics in full swing, it feels as though the entire world has a clear focus on MOVEMENT.
...my question....does movement always equal action?
Shifting to a yogic gear, the first of two Full Moon's in August started yesterday. The first paving way for the ever so rare Blue Moon. Then there's the fact that Mercury is still in Retrograde....so alignment wise, the hits just keep on coming!
It started me thinking...Mercury in Retrograde is quite a force. Retrogravy, as I like to call it, is a time of reflection. It's said if you're sensitive to it's affects you should really back off embarking on new endeavors. It's also said to stay away from technology. Then this full moon strolls on in and boasts of expansion, freedom, growth, surrender, peace, fulfillment, connection, and a network of loved one's who support our every move.
So...what gives?
...and then it pretty much dawned on me that action doesn't have to be movement.
Most of us are moving forward nearly every minute of every day..where is it getting us? The way these fancy moons differ from us is their movement promises EVOLUTION just by nature. Not so much with us human's. We're responsible for our own evolution! And sometimes that means....action in another way. Action in words, a thought, developing a plan, re-aligning a plan, or sometimes....staying still for a moment. All of the traits this moon holds, doesn't require any one person to take even the tiniest step physically forward. It's action from the heart. Action from the mind.
Since I'm from New York...I look up from writing this and take a look around. Movement everywhere...the angry NYC horns honking, commuters rushing, trains moving on at full speed....but where's the evolution in it all?
I believe it to be called "moving with purpose", my dear friends. Make your thoughts, intentions, and actions count in a way that will allow your own personal expansion. If you're not growing, don't do it!
As each and every one of us expands into this universe...we'll experience the evolution.
...my question....does movement always equal action?
Shifting to a yogic gear, the first of two Full Moon's in August started yesterday. The first paving way for the ever so rare Blue Moon. Then there's the fact that Mercury is still in Retrograde....so alignment wise, the hits just keep on coming!
It started me thinking...Mercury in Retrograde is quite a force. Retrogravy, as I like to call it, is a time of reflection. It's said if you're sensitive to it's affects you should really back off embarking on new endeavors. It's also said to stay away from technology. Then this full moon strolls on in and boasts of expansion, freedom, growth, surrender, peace, fulfillment, connection, and a network of loved one's who support our every move.
So...what gives?
...and then it pretty much dawned on me that action doesn't have to be movement.
Most of us are moving forward nearly every minute of every day..where is it getting us? The way these fancy moons differ from us is their movement promises EVOLUTION just by nature. Not so much with us human's. We're responsible for our own evolution! And sometimes that means....action in another way. Action in words, a thought, developing a plan, re-aligning a plan, or sometimes....staying still for a moment. All of the traits this moon holds, doesn't require any one person to take even the tiniest step physically forward. It's action from the heart. Action from the mind.
Since I'm from New York...I look up from writing this and take a look around. Movement everywhere...the angry NYC horns honking, commuters rushing, trains moving on at full speed....but where's the evolution in it all?
I believe it to be called "moving with purpose", my dear friends. Make your thoughts, intentions, and actions count in a way that will allow your own personal expansion. If you're not growing, don't do it!
As each and every one of us expands into this universe...we'll experience the evolution.
Thursday, July 26, 2012
LEE
She would think that was such bullshit, and we'd have loads of fun with it.
I met Lee about 10 years ago at an outdoor electronic music festival in NYC called "Festivus". It was the first event they held, and there was a small group of friends there. I had been WAITING patiently to meet this force. I had heard about her through mutual friends and I had an inkling we'd get along well. Well, that doesn't even cut it! It wasn't until later that fall that Lee and I became inseparable. I always think of our true friendship beginning after a drunken evening in the bowels of Brooklyn(to put it bluntly, it was BYOB and I clearly remember mixing my beverage of choice over a toilet in the ladies room) and us falling on a subway platform from laughing so hard. Our asses did he cleaning crew a service that Friday night.
We were in our early 20's...but we were embarking on a friendship that literally sails around once in a lifetime.
Countless evenings in her Park Slope apartment, dinners out, encouraging her to come visit me in Queens, gabbing about guys (for the most part we had the same taste in men. That sucked a time or two.), general gossiping, dancing on her couch, not minding when she bought the same couch as me, being her taste-tester when she made her AWESOME tequila sangria, chatting for endless hours on the phone after we had emailed all day, letting her borrow my car, letting ourselves reveal our vulnerabilities,and then seriously talking about our careers/accomplishments/next moves and always pushing ourselves so hard that we never had time to enjoy what we were accomplishing in the moment.
All of it...was fun. All of it, was genuine.
What I'm leaving out is that Lee and I also shared a similar passion for travel, and love of floating. We took a bunch of trips together, and generally just enjoyed any body of water and sunshine. Actually, to this day she's the only human being who's voluntarily shared this love with me. Tulum, Mexico was my favorite trip...if for nothing else because Lee told our resort the "clothing-optional" beach was "too naked". (no really, it's in writing on a comment card long since filed away)
On our last trip, though...my intuition told me something. As much as Lee would tell me she was okay, she was not. I noticed some things...and I wondered. Somewhere my intuition knew "something" was up. I tried to talk about it with her, but didn't get far. I was worried, but Lee always made sure I didn't worry too much. 7 months and 27 days later, Lee made the executive decision that her time in this life had come to an end.
Those closest to her have had our own ways of dealing with this intense loss.
I definitely got pretty pissed at her for a quick hot minute about 6 months after the fact. I got over that quickly, due to the one thing that continuously prevails. How much she loved every single person close to her. We all felt her absolute love in different ways. We felt her love, her support, and literally warmth emanating from her soul. We still hear it in her laugh, and I know..I still feel her. She is forever with me. Just when I need her, she pops up in her various forms. Lee was in pain, whether or not her pride would allow her to admit that. And on this day....2 years later, I miss her no less, but respect her decision no less. Mutual respect was what our friendship was based upon first and foremost...for better or for worse.
So there's something to embrace here....which is the fact that a presence such as Lee comes along once in a lifetime. It comes along to teach you both something. Hold it close while it's close to you.
So while I write this...in a Starbucks waiting out a horrendous NYC rainstorm, this came over the speakers. There's Lee again...(probably trying to point out all my typos before spellcheck).
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MFlNxDGPlvA
Sunday, July 22, 2012
BELIEVE
"It's all make-believe, isn't it?" ~ Marilyn Monroe
...well the thing is, it's not.Belief holds much more power than we're giving it credit for. Belief is a power you create.
Take the power, set YOU free!
We all have goals, and dreams....and at some point we've under-estimated them. I've learned, and continue to learn as I live this life from my heart, that belief is essentially your god given right! (if you don't get down with G.O.D, fill in the blank!)
We're not here to believe what people tell us, or what the media "reports" to us, or what some person or another is trying to sell us. We're here to believe in every single thing that supports us on a daily basis. I've learned recently belief goes beyond your family, friends, co-workers, etc that are supporting you...it's your truth that supports you. If you live from that, there's no bounds...life is limitless!
Believing in yourself at the soul level, a cellular level is what I'm getting at. Feel the things you believe in most with every fiber of your being. Feel it, breathe it, smell it, touch it. When your beliefs are found on this level....you will not falter! Your truth, your friends, family, co-workers, and even your pets are supporting you in every way to transform your beliefs into reality.
Breathe it all in...the love, support, possibility, and expand...into this constant of believing in yourself!
Thursday, July 12, 2012
MEA
My friend Mea started off my week with an invaluable lesson.
Before I shed light on the lesson, I need to shed light on Mea. I've described her many times as being the most brilliant person I know. She's this sparkling package of optimism, humility, spirituality, walking/talking brilliance...really any words I use to fill in the blanks will not do. Mea is just SPARKLING. Our friendship developed quite unexpectedly, but I can easily say she is my soulmate. And I'm SO lucky to have her on my side.
Bottom line is, this week I was made to feel as though I had failed at something. The word "ADVERSITY" came up...and I was "guided" as to how I should react in this "time of adversity". I, on the other hand only applied the meaning of adversity to the fact that this Bonehead may get my foot in his...well...
I knew deep down, it was a matter of perspective....and mostly MOTIVE that lead to this disturbing conversation. Meaning, I know the manipulation directed at me was dead-friggen-wrong. Some of us have been through this, right? Someone or something claims it's wrath on us...somehow making us believe we're accountable for something in some way. We take on the brunt, load, weight of the situation....and in general just feel pretty worthless. Here's where Mea and her lesson step right in!
I kept thinking about this word "adversity" and it's meaning....AND the fact that it wasn't a word/meaning I've come across often. A conversation with Mea led to the discussion of our own inner power. (Mea and I keep it really real, and really deep more often than not) How our growth in our personal and professional lives through the current lifespan of our friendship has found us our inner expansion into the world we were meant to create for ourselves, and the POWER we hold in it. I've decided, that's my meaning of adversity. And that's exactly how I've taken this situation by the potatoes and translated it into something meaningful and positive.
THANK YOU MEA, FOR HOLDING UP THE MIRROR!
There are so many times in so many places in our lives a person or situation will attempt to get the better of us. And it's absolutely fine...to feel the feelings connected to that. When you come across this hiccup of life, talk to a friend/a loved one/your bartender...someone who really and truly knows every inch of who you are. Ask them literally or figuratively, to hold up the mirror. It's easy to lose sight within pessismism and manipulations. But it's also easy to find yourself. BECAUSE YOU'RE ALWAYS THERE!
...and just as I was brainstorming this blog earlier this evening, intuitively (as always) I received an "I Love You" text from Mea, as I frequently do.
Thursday, July 5, 2012
INSPIRATION
It's been HOT in NYC for the past...well...3 weeks.
So, while I'm sure there's been plenty of perspiration....I'm just not so sure about inspiration.
My new gigs have kept me out of Manhattan for the past few months, until this week. As I hoped on a subway route that was all too familiar for as long as I can remember...I couldn't help but catch on to all the drained human beings in that subway car. This drainage continued in the 59th Street station, past Bloomies, and all the way down 3rd Avenue. People were just hot and sticky and not connected in any which way to any particular thing.
I mentioned this to my dinner date, citing that I don't miss that feeling at all. And I certainly do not, but I felt myself painfully aware of what everyone around me was not.
WHERE IS OUR INSPIRATION?
There was no light in this city of all cities (sorry, I'm biased. Deal.) There was no buzz....barely a hum stirring in the people I encountered. Which brings me to this.... A few years back I really and truly felt like I was done with NYC. Somewhere around 2 years ago I began to rekindle my love affair. Not just with New York, but with MYSELF! I found the light in me...and just carried it around. Sometimes in my back pocket, and sometimes in every single fiber of my being. And by light...I mean soul. My soul was connecting to something entirely grand which led to my own grand expansions. Whatever it connected to is quite honestly 100% irrelevant. The relevancy lies in the connection itself. In the fact that I was driven, guided, and entirely motivated.
Take a minute, preferably in the comfort of some air conditioning, and remind yourself of the things you love. Allow yourself a handful of moments to connect with what makes and continues to create you. Stop moving forward, just be still. Breathe it all in, and uncover these bits of yourself. Hold it close to your heart, and make a deal with yourself. Make a deal to connect in this way, or other ways...just a bit more frequently. It's okay, I promise.
In this bustling world where we're literally working our asses off just to survive, find survival in what inspires you.
Wednesday, June 20, 2012
SOLSTICE
Sol - Sun
Sistere - To stand still
Today, June 20,2012 marks the start of our splendid Summer!
The Solstice is an auspicious time to honor the sun and allow the welcoming arms of nature to embrace you. Summer makes me think of dancing in lush grass with bare feet, or a sandy beach....lakes, rivers, oceans...or splashing in puddles of warm June rain.
Mostly during these summer months I think of how easy it is to live from a place of inter-connectedness with nature. I think of animals in nature that signify this time...and for some reason I always think of a butterfly. To me, it represents beauty, creativity, and endless freedom. Then I think of how that all relates to...life.
We're all so open and free during this time of year...enjoying time outdoors with friends and family. Playing games outdoors, bbq'ing, soaking up as much sunshine and fresh air as we can. Smiles are plentiful and our hearts are radiating with warmth.
Take this sense of warmth with you as you celebrate your Solstice and enjoy this time of year. Like a butterfly, take flight in the direction of your dreams.
~Namaste~
Wednesday, June 13, 2012
DETACH
Emotions...swirling all around.
Something, someone, somewhere always makes you want to lose yourself.
Emotions are tricky, and feeling them is an open invitation to reacting to them. Actually, scratch that! Just their presence alone sends out the invite! Control isn't always an option when it comes to emotions...because first of all, you need to know what each one means to you.
I've met people who are unable to identify emotion (me about 7 years ago). Then, there's the crew that are deeply terrified by emotions, either theirs or someone else. More human beings than not are just...ya know...a little stuck on the control part of emotions rather than letting them run it's course. Control is what turns into reaction. Why? Because emotions are our own personal tidal waves...and they're not MEANT to be controlled.
So...here's this novel concept. Detach.
Very, very, very, very, very simple, no? No.
More times than not, the emotions and the drama they bring with them don't even belong to you!! Human beings are sensitive to other human beings moods. And we get caught up. Good, not so good, or indifferent somehow these emotions become ours and we find ourselves in a reactive phase.
Detachment for me always meant distance. Running far, far away from
emotions...only to have to deal with them at some point in the future.
What detachment means is, really, observance. Simple observance of
what's swirling about in it's natural state.
When I found myself getting caught up in anothers emotions...I'd mentally pull myself out of the equation. I'd then imagine all the emotions and drama swirling around a particular person or event swirling away in a cloud of dust blown by the wind. Sometimes I'd imagine containing the drama in a jar, or a box, or anything that once was closed could never be open again.
By imagining these things, I'd bring a sense of grounded sensibility to MYSELF in the situations I'd find myself in. No more reaction...just plain ol' clarity!!
Slowly I'd start asking myself about my own emotions and drama's...
* How is reaction helping?
* How is it hurting?
* Is there a pattern? (am I reacting to the same thing in different clothing)
* What is it that I'm REALLY reacting to?
And just as slowly as I started to ask myself those questions (...and I mean SLOWLY! My reaction cycles were vicious until I REALLY started giving them the attention they needed)...a clearer sense of detachment FROM reaction started to occur.
It's been hard, hard work to get to a place where detachment is almost natural (I did say "almost", right?). But the point is pretty much to START the observations....start the end of the vicious cycle. If I had to put a couple pennies on it, I'd bet that NONE of us like ourselves in our various reactionary phases, hmmmm?
Take a look. Take an example....maybe your reactions are mostly at work, directed towards your mother, or a spouse, or a pet, or an ensemble that's making you look fat, or just a flat out bad decision. Ask yourself the questions above and any others that come to mind.
Once the clouds of judgement and reaction clear....you'll learn a bit about your emotions but in a completely detached state.
...and then a welcomed change. Peace.
Monday, June 4, 2012
SIMPLICITY
sim·plic·i·ty
noun, plural
1. the state, quality, or an instance of being simple
2. freedom from complexity, intricacy, or division into parts: an organism of great simplicity.
3. absence of luxury, pretentiousness, ornament, etc; plainness: a life of simplicity
4. freedom from deceit or guile; sincerity; artlessness; naturalness: a simplicity of manner.
5. lack of mental acuteness or shrewdness: Politics is not a field for simplicity about human nature.
...even as I type the word....the world starts to melt away.
All the self created clutter in my mind toward any given person/place/thing is always illuminated when I allow some SIMPLICITY to expand into the situation.
No worries...it's simple to just..ya know...TALK about simplicity! I know you're hovering over there in a dark corner...guilty of letting daily additives ultimately affect your decision making. Guess what? ME TOO!
Come out into the light, and bring your complications with you!
There's plenty of reasons we get carried away and let the simplicity drift out of any given situation. Fear plays a role in that, doubt, insecurities, and conditioning also play a role in it.
But....WHAT IF WE SHIFTED TO A SIMPLER PROSPECTIVE? Where we allow only FACTS to outline our current situation?
Nothing but the facts...simplicity gives big ideas BIGGER meaning.
The truth here, though, is...it's easy to get caught up. I realize that more than anyone, but I also realize there's always a element of simplicity at play to the things we humans complicate. If you ever look at nature or animals or what have you and think they have the "easy life"...well so can YOU! Nature, animals, etc aren't using thoughts to cloud their judgement. What is, is. Simply and effectively.
As a culture, we live in our heads. Simplicity does not. Simplicity EXISTS. In every situation, every day, all around us. To find it...we're not going to go through a mental checklist. No way, Jose. Put your good ol' pen to paper and simplify what it is your working on. After you do, go back through and weed out ANYTHING that's not fact. Then, after you're done impressing yourself with the ability to see the simplicity, identify some simple action steps.
Sunday, May 13, 2012
HEART
It's certainly been a while.
Through death, and life, grief, and celebration....I've been living from the HEART, lately.
How connected is your Heart? What is it connected to? And connected to again?
I capitalize Heart, because to me, it's a state. Not like...Kansas, or Kentucky. It's one of the states you pass through in order to get to FREEDOM!
Living from your heart isn't necessarily easy....especially in the cerebral type of culture we live in. That seems to be changing with the various movements and demonstrations happening at various times in various places for various causes. People are deciding to move, literally and figuratively straight from the heart. Straight from what connects them to their truth.
I realized my Heart is where I live...and started to be truer to it. As I started to feel my world shift, I realized it was the 21st of April....a New Moon. A moon my teacher says, was designed to bring us back to our truest nature. Our home. I found it all so....aligned. And all I had to do was listen. There it was.....EXPANSION!
Living from your heart will set you free.
Fears, doubts, guilt, wonder, overwhelming selfishness, and even the unpleasant affects of the outside world seem to dissolve as your world expands into exactly the places you're directing it to go. Freedom lies within the Heart. Living from it gives it the space to grow.
The unfortunate thing is I can't give you a road map to your own heart...or even a tutuorial on how to get there. If the heart feels right for you, you need to connect yourself. Start with some deep breaths directly into your chest. Feel that small expansion, and check out what you find. Breath into that, and go deeper. See what else exsists. CONNECT to whatever it is you find.
Do not judge this expansion.....and do not fear it.
Simply feel it, and your Heart will lead the way.
Wednesday, March 14, 2012
PERCEPTION
…as a human being, this is one of the hardest concepts for me to grasp.
That out there somewhere there’s a different version of reality than the one you’ve planted yourself in? And I mean PLANTED! Firmly believing your beliefs to be true. Not just to you, but the others around you.
I’ve actually been so curious about this topic lately, I’ve looked up it’s true definition.
Perception: is the process of attaining awareness or understanding of the environment by organizing and interpreting information.
So to sum it up…perception is all sourced through you. To boot, perception is absolutely dependent on your nervous system.
I’m learning that I actually DO NOT believe perception to be all yours. Because how you perceive things is how you take them in. And then you spit them back out…projecting a belief in a certain way. That in turn affects your environment and the people around you. Although it’s an excellent thing to be standing strong in your own, there’s the possibility that you’re not letting yourself see the full picture.
Asking this allows your perception to become a bit more tangible and a little less…well, rock solid. It opens you up to possibilities, other ways of thinking, but mostly…a more honest form of human to human interaction.
"If the doors of perception were cleansed everything would appear to man as it is, infinite." ~ William Blake
That out there somewhere there’s a different version of reality than the one you’ve planted yourself in? And I mean PLANTED! Firmly believing your beliefs to be true. Not just to you, but the others around you.
I’ve actually been so curious about this topic lately, I’ve looked up it’s true definition.
So to sum it up…perception is all sourced through you. To boot, perception is absolutely dependent on your nervous system.
Normally if you ask me about yourself, your perceptions, awareness, understanding, beliefs….I’d say WHOLE HEARTEDLY that they’re all yours. And you should own
each and every belief you have. And you SHOULD! But…now I’m thinking, you should take a minute. And give your perceptions space. Give them the opportunity to see what else is out there waiting to be perceived. I’m learning that I actually DO NOT believe perception to be all yours. Because how you perceive things is how you take them in. And then you spit them back out…projecting a belief in a certain way. That in turn affects your environment and the people around you. Although it’s an excellent thing to be standing strong in your own, there’s the possibility that you’re not letting yourself see the full picture.
I’ve decided I’m going to start asking this question…
“How am I looking at this, and how can I look at it differently?” What are the different versions?
"If the doors of perception were cleansed everything would appear to man as it is, infinite." ~ William Blake
Thursday, March 8, 2012
FLOW
When the tides settle, it’s time to allow yourself to get washed away in your own natural eb & flow.
There’s a rhythm to us all. A push and pull to each one of our lives that we ride on….sometimes knowing it, sometimes not.
Usually the question is….are YOU able to just let life flow?
I always say…when your current state feels like you’re pushing against resistance…back off a bit and give your world room to breathe. There’s a natural order we as individuals are destined to pursue. I’m sorry that I cannot explain it to you in any other terms other than you know it when you feel it. It’s 100% instinctual and, in a split second, you decide without going through your process that you’re going to trust and believe in the direction you’re headed.
Once you let go, you find yourself. As your flowing along you come across the person you want to be, the job you’d like to work at, the people you’d like to love, the environment you’d like to surround yourself with, and so on. Letting go takes courage, it takes faith, and it takes trust that your nature is leading you in the “right” direction. It’s entirely brave to let your natural order of things take over and guide. There’s so, so many instances in our lives that we author and create that are predetermined by everything BUT our natural order. Giving in and acknowledging there’s something bigger and yes, BETTER than what you have control over is big.
HUGE!
It means that you trust in something you may not always be able to define. You’re tapping into your instinct, but mostly it’s coming from your heart.
You’re riding on a feeling….and it’s feeling just fine!
There’s a rhythm to us all. A push and pull to each one of our lives that we ride on….sometimes knowing it, sometimes not.
Usually the question is….are YOU able to just let life flow?
I always say…when your current state feels like you’re pushing against resistance…back off a bit and give your world room to breathe. There’s a natural order we as individuals are destined to pursue. I’m sorry that I cannot explain it to you in any other terms other than you know it when you feel it. It’s 100% instinctual and, in a split second, you decide without going through your process that you’re going to trust and believe in the direction you’re headed.
Once you let go, you find yourself. As your flowing along you come across the person you want to be, the job you’d like to work at, the people you’d like to love, the environment you’d like to surround yourself with, and so on. Letting go takes courage, it takes faith, and it takes trust that your nature is leading you in the “right” direction. It’s entirely brave to let your natural order of things take over and guide. There’s so, so many instances in our lives that we author and create that are predetermined by everything BUT our natural order. Giving in and acknowledging there’s something bigger and yes, BETTER than what you have control over is big.
HUGE!
It means that you trust in something you may not always be able to define. You’re tapping into your instinct, but mostly it’s coming from your heart.
You’re riding on a feeling….and it’s feeling just fine!
Sunday, January 29, 2012
ALIGN
How is it that you would like to align yourself with your outside world?
Recently (in a super fun yoga class), I was reminded about the story of Krishna and Kaliya.
Krishna is...well, the man. He lives in this village where Kaliya the serpent has come to visit. He's a venomous serpent, and is poisoning the local water supply by visiting. The villagers have asked him to leave, but he continues to pour his venom into the waters. The grass is browning, wildlife is dying...and soon this village will be severely affected. Krishna is seen one day walking down to the water to have a chat with Kaliya. Krishna dives into the water. There's some thrashing about, and then nothing. (some versions of this story even contain bloodshed) The villagers are peering into the water and cannot seem to find either Krishna OR Kaliya. Worry sets in, but eventually Kaliya emerges tall from the waters. The villagers cheer as they see Krishna dancing on top of Kaliya's head. Krishna continues to dance and tap his feet, and a calm comes over Kaliya. "I'm sorry, Krishna...I am very sorry to have caused the villagers pain, but as you can see I'm a serpent by nature. Serpents are venomous by nature. I know nothing else, but I do not want to harm you and these people." Krishna speaks..." I understand your nature, and by nature, do not ask you to stop. Will you move there, to the neighboring waters where you can live freely? Then, these people can live freely." Kaliya thinks about it, and agrees to move on. Soon the vegetation has resumed it's natural healthy green color, and the village people are able to utilize the water again!
Really...what Krishna asked Kaliya to do is to align his nature.
Krishna & Kaliya (link to another version of the story)
I find this story profound...and have recently found the concept of alignment profound. Aligning is something we need to do, day after day. Several times a day, even!
The trick is, to first define how we'd like to align ourselves in our lives. Thinking first of how to align with family, and then friends, then professionally, romantically, then so on. Defining who you are and what you'd like to represent in various aspects of your life....then bringing it life by creating ACTION!
It's a really fun process...therefore, I'm simply sharing and opening it up to you.
Align. Again, and again, and again.
Friday, January 13, 2012
CONNECT
Connection is one of the single most important tools we use to tap into our awareness.
....it's also one of the single most important tools we avoid.
When we're in the thick of it...so deep into our neurosis....we lose a piece of ourselves. We are completely disconnected with our awareness, and therefore, ourselves.
Connection leads us to truth...which is one of the reasons most avoid re-connecting. Fooling ourselves is SO much better than whatever we're going to have to deal with if we actually tapped into the truth, right?! Um...no.
Connecting to ourselves is pretty much like charging our cell phones/various bits of technology. We have to do it EVERYDAY! Sometimes multiple times a day. Connection, just like these pieces of technology, practically hand us our information on a silver platter. That is, if we look for it. If we press it's buttons and dig a little bit deeper. Connection IS the foundation for truth.
So what connects you? It could be interaction with friends, it could be physical (Yoga, MMA, Karate, etc), it could be alone time to contemplate, it could be a trip or location in nature where you recharge and connect to life at it's source. Whatever it is...identify it, and use the shit out of it!
You WANT to be connected to yourself. You want to remind yourself DAILY who are and what you want. You want to remember at least once a day what makes you tick! And you want to pass it forward. Connecting inwardly only leads to connection outwardly. The people around you respond when you're plugged into yourself and walking about EYES WIDE OPEN!
Don't be afraid of connecting. The good, not so good, or indifferent are all beautiful parts of you. Wear them ALL with pride, and get to know them inside out!
Sunday, January 8, 2012
SPACE
I was away between holidays on a much needed vacation....
As per usual I had all of my texts in hand, to-do lists, ideas on updating my website, marketing, blogging, etc. You get the drift. I was almost looking forward to my getaway as a week where I can ACCOMPLISH all of the things I haven't been able to during the insane month of December.
Soooo....guess how much of it I got to?
Zip! Zilch! Nada!!
Seriously...I maybe spent 10 minutes on "work".
Which I realized is what a vacation should be! I didn't even feel bad about my "lack of progress"....I actually felt a little bit better and refreshed for it.
...So, then naturally I started thinking about all the crazy New Years Resolutions that had probably already gone bad. Not for lack of trying, mind you....but for the lack of...well...space.
It's great to have goals, really. I'm building a career on it....so....yea, I totally believe in goals. What I don't believe in is the pressure to get the damn things there already! The thing is...anything that's cultivated so super quickly I find crashes and burns just as quickly. And then there's dissapointment. Just look on Facebook....it's there daily. Like morgue you can scroll through, with all the resolutions that had SO much possibility!
The beauty of this entire blob of words is....THEY STILL CAN BE! And will be, if you just let them!
When you're seriously tackling anything, not just a New Years Resolution, space is your truest friend. When you give things space....and time...they have a way of coming to you in their truest form. The way your goal, endeavor, (website...ahem!), should truly be FOR YOU. It doesn't become something that's forced. It becomes something that's focused, with clear direction, and the steps you're going to continue to take to GET TO THAT PLACE! Once you give it space...you're able to visualize it, breathe it, taste it even! It becomes what you REALLY want.
It's novel, I know. Stepping back to give something breathing room is some of the hardest awareness to cultivate. Especially where I am (NYC), where instant gratification is sort of in the manual. But remind yourself this....just a few moments to clear the air will give you something wilder than you could have hoped for. The beauty and lessons that stick with you, are what resides in that space.
Chew on it....utilize it...and then smile to yourself as you make your way!
Oh, and Happy 2012! Wishes for many inbreaths, shifts, and realizations towards your truest self!
Love, love, and more love!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)